I grew up with goodly parents, bothers and a sister. We were active members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I always loved the church, especially when I was young and I attended Primary. The music from the primary songs really spoke to me and I think I always knew the church was true and good because of those beautiful feelings of the Spirit in Primary.
I knew that being a member of my church was different than churches of my classmates at school. I grew up knowing that the way we worshipped Jesus Christ was different than most Christians. So, I was always a little shy about sharing my beliefs with others because I didn’t want anyone making fun of something that was so pure and sweet to me. I was able to stay in the shadows spiritually most of my life, enjoying church on Sunday and basically living the gospel in secret and not sharing too much with my peers about my way of life and beliefs.
That all changed when I attended my first year in junior college. Originally, I wanted to go to Brigham Young University after high school but my GPA was low and my tests scores weren’t very high. So I went to our local junior college so that I could eventually transfer to BYU. My goal was to take classes that I thought I’d do well in and have a good GPA. One class I enrolled in was Bible Literature. I thought that this class would be somewhat easy for myself having grown up in the Church, reading scriptures and I had taken LDS early morning seminary classes in high school for the last four years. I soon found out that this class wasn’t a bible literature class at all but more of what I would call a “bible bashing” class. The first day of class everyone was telling which religion they were associated and already taking sides on what was their interpretation of the scriptures. I felt very uncomfortable the whole time I was there. At the end of class, the teacher asked “Where are my mormons?” I instantly felt a target on my back. The teacher’s first assignment was for the Mormons in the class to explain their “plan of salvation.” I couldn’t believe it. Here I’d been avoiding such situations for years and now I was confronted with something that I felt totally unprepared for. I’m embarrassed to say that I immediately dropped the class. I couldn’t face the scrutiny… the possible humiliation. Anyway, after dropping the class, I agonized over the way I was acting. I was so weak and I knew it. What was causing so much anxiety? I needed something to happen in my life to get me over this terrible fear that I had built up in myself which prevented me to converse about the Church to anyone. Truly, the Church was the one thing that I held so sacred in my life… why was I acting so childish? As I pondered this experience in prayer, I had kept thinking about how I had never truly read the Book of Mormon from cover to cover. I had read parts of it throughout my life and always felt good about it but I wasn’t a very good reader. I struggled with comprehension issues and so I would get bored if I had to read anything for a long time but when this whole experience happened I convinced myself that if I read the Book of Mormon and received an honest witness of its truthfulness that I would get over my insecurities of sharing my views about the Church. So, I did it, I made a promise to myself that I would read the Book of Mormon, cover to cover, and ask Heavenly Father in prayer for a spiritual witness. So every night from that day, I read the book and I prayed every night before reading that I would get a spiritual witness. Night after night I prayed and read, night after night, no witness but I had so much more determination than I ever had and even though I wasn’t receiving the spiritual experience I was hoping to get, I was actually enjoying the reading. I was feeling a sense of great satisfaction in following through with this commitment.
As I was nearing the end of finishing the book, I can remember being in the middle of reading the seventh chapter of Moroni. I had just said a quick prayer and jumped into bed because it was a rather cold night, as I started reading more verses, an unexplainable warmth came over me. I then felt a distinct burning in my bosom that I had never felt before in my life. I knew instantly that this was my witness. I then proceeded to crawl out of my bed and thank Heavenly Father for such a wonderful, spiritual feeling. I knew for a surety that the Book of Mormon was true. I knew it and I knew God knew I knew it. First thing I remember after thanking God for such a wonderful feeling was that I needed to share this book with others and my experience with others.
Those sacred feeling that I received on that night in my bedroom will always mean so much to me. It was one of those few miraculous moments of my life that I can always turn to when I’m confronted with negative thoughts, confusion, or dealing with trials and tribulations. I can turn my thoughts directly to that divine moment and all those wonderful feelings come back vividly to my mind and I say to myself “Yah, maybe life isn’t perfect right now but that thing that happened in my bedroom was real” God is real and miraculous. He loves me and He answered my prayer and I’ll never forget it.
